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Essential Torah Shiurim

DALL·E 2023-12-20 17.55.01 - A hyper-realistic image of a Jewish philosopher on top of a m


DALL·E 2023-12-20 17.47.07 - A hyper-realistic image of a Jewish wedding canopy (chuppah)

Marriage & Shalom Bais

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Chagim & Special Days

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The Ten Commandments of Marriage  (106 mins)
Rabbi Avigdor Miller

Probably the most important and practical advice that could be given to help create and maintain Shalom Bais! It's worth listening to 4 or 5 times—especially for newlyweds!

(1) Be realistic (2) Do not disrupt the routine of marriage (3) Make peace (4) Never say the word “divorce”

(5) Be loyal (6) Never say “I hate you” (7) Love your neighbor as yourself

(8) Display your regard for your spouse (9) Maintain your appearance (10) Don't be a tyrant

CORE MESSAGE: Marriage is hard work but there are rules that can make it easier!


Intimacy is about transcending all "Things"  (50 mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Incredibly insightful advice about intimacy and the male/female dynamic.

Our grandparents were one with each other and argued about things. We are connected to things about each other and, unfortunately, are not even aware that there is another.

Good chemistry means the guy feels comfortable in his masculinity and the girl feels comfortable being a woman.

CORE MESSAGE: Marriage is two people merging with each other, nothing about each other!

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The Three Pillars of Marriage  (3 mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Generosity is the willingness to give of yourself—your possessions, time, space, opinion, and words. 

Respect is honoring dignity—the dignity of your spouse and your own dignity. Don't make it hard for your spouse to respect you!

Sanctity is remembering that Marriage is G-d's Idea. Marriage is a Divine institution and you are have the privilege of experiencing it!

CORE MESSAGE: Generosity, respect, and sanctity are the pillars of a successful marriage!

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The Difference Between Intimacy and Sex  (17 mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

The "Free Love" movement of the sixties may have liberated sex from the previous social taboos but at the cost of intimacy.

The subsequent social confusion has compounded the matter and now the art of intimacy—the merging of husband and wife into one—has largely been lost.

CORE MESSAGE: Intimacy is not subjective. Even closing the bedroom door is an intimate act!

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The Man's Role in Marriage  (115 mins)
Rabbi Shais Taub

This shiur is exclusively for married men and chossonim!

The transition from bochur to married man is comparable to the transition from night to day. How are we to handle such a quantum change?

This shiur presents an open and comprehensive, yet candid and modest, exploration of sexuality through the male lens within the framework of marriage.

CORE MESSAGE: The man's role in marriage is to give. Period!

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Marriage is also a Cure for Feeling Alone  (31 Mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Marriage is about giving yourself to your spouse, not just your love!

Marrying someone because you love them, shockingly enough, is not dissimilar to marrying them for their money. When we are zoche to give our "self" to our spouse we stop feeling alone in the world—and that is the essence of marriage.

CORE MESSAGE: You love the one you marry. You don't marry the one you love!

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Mashpia & Makabel  (123 Mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Although Rabbi Friedman emphasizes the importance of the roles of mashpia (influencing/giving) and makabel (being influenced/receiving) this video covers many more ideas.

Rabbi Friedman answers lots of very real questions with lots of deep, yet extremely practical advice.

CORE MESSAGE: The man is mashpia and the woman is makabel! Anything else will not work.

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Love & Respect  (76 Mins)
Rabbi Sheis Taub

Love is what I do for you, but respect is what I don't do because of you!

Most of us love to love—"giving" generally gives to us, but refraining from doing something that I want to do because you don't want me to is difficult! And it is in this act of holding oneself back that one's spouse feels that they exist in your world! 

CORE MESSAGE: Love and respect are both essential, but respect comes first!

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The Formula for a Good Marriage (74 Mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Rabbi Friedman emphasizes the paramount importance of respect in marriage. He illustrates how respect manifests in daily actions—advising against yelling from one end of the house to the other and advocating for presenting oneself in the most respectable manner. This, he suggests, enhances the likelihood of mutual respect between spouses, among other valuable insights.

CORE MESSAGE: You CAN NOT marry the wrong person, just like you can not have the wrong children!

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Four Tips to Improve Your Marriage (11 Mins)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Tip 1: You can make your marriage better even without the help of your spouse!

Tip 2: A husband/wife is completely different than a man/woman. Be the former!

Tip 3: Speak to your spouse in a respectful tone!

Tip 4: Do exactly what they ask. Do not attempt to interpret!

CORE MESSAGE: Changing your behavior and your narrative will improve your marriage!


The Joy of Intimacy  (Audiobook read by Rabbi Friedman—around 4 hrs)
Rabbi Manis Friedman

Rabbi Friedman delves into the complexities of human relationships, emphasizing that intimacy is not just a physical or emotional state, but a deeply spiritual and holistic connection between man and wife.

He advises a mindful approach to relationships, where honest communication, mutual respect, and a deep appreciation of each other's uniqueness are key to cultivating lasting bonds.

CORE MESSAGE: True intimacy in relationships is a deeply spiritual connection and merging 

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